BearWaller Hollar - "If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles."--Doug Larson

Paris or Berlin...

Mon, 15 Feb 2010 15:36:16 -0500

I've been studying a little French, and some German- that along with a host of other things have been taking up all of my time.

Granted,
I think all languages have complications, and while I know that English is supposed to be the worst of them- I'm glad I'm English speaking. Mostly because if I had to learn it at this point I'd shoot myself.
But I'm also glad that a trash bag is neither male, nor female, and that it hasn't been neutered.
It's just a trash bag.
It's probably a lesbian,
but we (the English speaking), won't concern ourselves with that.

It's slow going on the farm...

Mon, 11 Jan 2010 18:14:48 -0500

The weather has made me a recluse lately. My power was out for a week, I've been a month without a phone (the line is in the middle of the creek), I'm almost out of reading material, and you know yourself that I've never been one to watch a lot of TV.
I did, however, watch a very interesting documentary on the removal of three of the worlds largest tumors last night on Discover Health. And true to form I've had a backache all day and I developed a fixation on a large lump on my leg. Turns out it's just a freckle, but I'm keeping an eye on it. I'll bet they all start out as just freckles.
In the mean time, in an effort to stay sane, I just gave 2dawg auburn highlights. He doesn't seem happy, but I think they bring out his big brown eyes. Junior said that if I brought them out anymore I would have to scrape them off of the floor.
Good point.
Anyway,
I'm giving him a mani-pedi as soon as I can drag his big chihuahua butt out from under the bed. (Revlon's Rusty Rose with glitter flecks. He'll look adorable!)

Not so great...

Sat, 12 Dec 2009 22:09:08 -0500

I bought these for 2dawg because they are his favorite. My dad fed them to him everyday when he stayed with me and he hasn't had any since dad died. I thought that they looked exceptionally festive with the toothpick and the cherry sticking in them.
Let me just tell you before you run out to buy these for your own dog, that when you open them up there are no toothpicks, and not a cherry one.
Mind you,
I'm not a big fan of meat in a can,
but this contains what appears to be a collection of dog peckers floating around in a phlegm bath.
Sorry 2dawg,
but if you think I'm going back out to Krogers tonight for cherries you've lost your mind.

Thanks...

Thu, 26 Nov 2009 06:37:52 -0500

"He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has." -Epictetus

I thank God every day for my wonderful son and what is left of my family, for my 2dog and the stray momma and six puppies under the bat cave, and for the friends that haven't forgotton me. I thank him for my job (it's hard, but a lot of people don't have one), that I made it to a level 53 in MafiaWars, that my hogfish haven't died in Fishville, and that I have banana pudding. There is other stuff too.

Happy Thanksgiving everybody.

darbimae

Regretsy...

Wed, 25 Nov 2009 22:32:12 -0500

Bailey from Goose Yard told me about this sight. I"m not a big fan of Etsy, but I love Regretsy.

My friends call me Gabagool...

Tue, 24 Nov 2009 22:10:35 -0500

You realize, of course, that I've been peppered with a maelstrom of personal bad luck which has all but stopped the demiurgic drivel that once spouted from my pen.
I could give you all the gory details of my wicked ill fate, but I don’t want to be a leper bore (the anger, the denial, the inevitable loss of appendages…blah, blah, blah).
No worries,
I am as resilient and ineradicable as a case of stage four cooties, and I’ve managed to work my way through the anger issues that popped up with the near loss of my dactyl phalanxes (sounds better than little pigs) by turning to Facebook. A networking site to many, a place to say hello to friends and family and indulge in meaningful conversation to others, but for me-
not so much.
I’ve stayed sane by directing my umbrage at Facebook’s MafiaWars.
Unfortunately,
I now have to get up an hour earlier just to garrote a mobster or two, bribe an elected official, or knock over a couple of liquor stores.
No matter.
It’s kept me going for the last few weeks. Just this evening I got iced by some asshole named Luigi Fettuccine. I sucker punched him four times, beat him until he died, then waited until he came back to life so I could put a hit out on him. (Did I mention the anger issues I’m working through?) While drinking cheap coffee at 6:00am I sneak in offline (lest someone should try to chat with me and mess with my concentration) I kill everyone that I can, beat up the rest, then I gather up the pumpkins I planted over at Farmville (I‘m saving for a harvester), milk the cows, and gather the eggs before heading out to Fishville. This morning I thought I’d be late for court before I could get the tank cleaning and fish training done (those Hawaiian Hogfish are dumber than owl shit. If I couldn’t learn to jump through a hoop any faster than that I‘d fillet myself).

I'll keep you posted on the harvester.

I couldn't have said it better myself...

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 08:20:12 -0500

Here is Little Shrunken singing the blues.

Appropriate for a Monday morning I think.

Pork Influenza

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 20:18:47 -0500

I had previously thought that my bout with rabies this past summer was about as ugly as it gets. (Yes, the foaming at the mouth, side-stepping, pissed off and going for the throat rabies.) My leg swelled to twice it's size (and if you've ever seen one of my little fat legs, that in itself is scary and on the far end of the ugly scale).
There were red streaks running from a large and festering wound that was constantly oozing a variety of juices that my purple and black calf continually conjured up. I couldn't sleep at night for the pain, and I had to keep the leg elevated during the day- which was killer for me.
Shots, big pills, lectures from everyone and their little sister, and the health department.

It was a nightmare.

Very bad.

It was not,
however,
as bad as my recent affliction with the hinni flu.
Sprawled on the couch, supine and shaking, with four state police issue wool blankets and a Chihuahua foot warmer, I rolled for five days. I coughed a dry and non-productive cough, and with each deep bark I realized I knew what it felt like to have a rusty Moundsville shiv driven into the deepest parts of my ample chest. .
I died twice on a Sunday night, came back to life on Monday long enough to get up and pee, then went into a brief coma only to die again on Tuesday.

A lady bedecked in a white mask and gloves was roaming the streets today. She told me she was going to the doctor because she had the flu.
Nah. She didn't. No flu for her.
Because if she had it, she would be too sick to be out running around town showing off her mask.
I never made it to the doctor. The only way I was going to get off of the couch was if someone broke into the house,
slapped me on a gurney, and hauled me unconscious to the ER. I was too sick to move.

I'll take a bout of rabies any day.

darbimae

Paranormal Activity

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 19:37:24 -0500

Just one thing.
If the boogyman that is haunting your house comes into your bedroom, grabs you by the feet, drags you out of bed and down the hall, then bites a chunk out of your back- don't stay in the boogyman house armed with a camera and a flashlight.
Find a Holiday Inn Express and book a room.

Zombieland...

Sun, 04 Oct 2009 09:51:56 -0400

I have to find someone to go with me to the Marquis this evening.

I need a diversion. This is the Zombieland trailer.

Baby Sis

Sun, 27 Sep 2009 13:16:21 -0400

used to dance like this to the car radio.

Tickled Pink...

Fri, 25 Sep 2009 06:55:27 -0400

Ahhh, but it is Friday.
There's always Friday to look forward to.

It's International Talk Like A Pirate Day...

Sat, 19 Sep 2009 08:30:19 -0400

but then,
I guess you already knew that.

Just remember the five A words- Ahoy, Avast, Aye, Aye-Aye, and Arrrrrrrrr. According to Cap'n Slappy and Ol' Slumbucket (or possibly Chumbucket, can't remember) it's all you need to get by.
I think that being able to play pirate all day will make things go smoother. (That's right, I'm not only going to talk like one- I'm breaking out the the ruffled blouse and a sword for swashbuckling.)
Better especially for the shopping part of the day.
I am, of course, having trouble getting 2dawg to keep his eye patch on. It's always something with that dog.

Here is the official site for: Talk Like a Pirate Day

Up early...

Mon, 14 Sep 2009 20:36:06 -0400

and peeking out the window before starting the long trek home. It's been quite a journey.

Bye everybody...

Mon, 27 Jul 2009 00:09:09 -0400